"A Church Musician’s Lament" redux « The Recovering Choir Director

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"A Church Musician’s Lament" redux

People are discussing Michael Olbash’s CWNews essay over on the RPINet forum. Unfortunately the tone of the piece is undermining its content—a tone that probably is apparent in many posts on this very website. I’m sure Michael is writing out of exasperation and betrayed idealism (fundamentalism?), and I know where he’s coming from.

The Vatican II liturgy documents, without the light of tradition, can be interpreted to allow for a wide array of options, period, and that is the tack that the navigators at the major liturgical music publishing houses et al. seem to have taken. (I have written on this before.) A classicist, like Michael seems to be, can count on no help from them to accomplish his objectives.

Speaking from experience, it’s very easy to transition from seeing what’s amiss with liturgical music to seeing what’s amiss with the liturgy itself. And it’s a terrible test of virtue for those with a little knowledge of what’s asked of liturgical music and of liturgical ministers. For youthful idealists like Michael and myself, heroic patience and humility are required of this job—virtues that develop with prayer and time. As we are both the results of a generation of “glitter and construction paper” catechesis (thanks, Dale), we were never taught, among other things, the virtues. However, we’re still responsible for learning them on paper and in practice in order to order ourselves rightly. Otherwise, we’d transform our youthful idealism to crusty, bitter cynicism.

In the end, as far as I’m concerned, the solution lies in proper catechesis. Proper catechesis about the Faith and morals, the liturgy with its rubrics and music, etc., taught firmly but charitably and patiently. And who’s charged with that responsibility?

I have opted to bow out of liturgical music leadership for the time being, and should I come back to it, it will not be for money. One of the reasons I am leaving is because I cannot shake the notion that I’ve been ‘bought’. Another reason is simply that I’m not a good leader. But the most important reason is that I believe that departing from music ministry leadership is good for my soul.

Posted 06.25.2003
by Aristotle Esguerra
3 comments.
Filed under: Relevant Reading.

3 Comments

I’m quite a bit older than you, I gather, but also came of age in the “glitter and construction paper” era of catechesis (I have always referred to it as the “God is Orange” School of Catholic Thought, in honor of a poster my fourth grade nun had on the wall.)

And I am about to re-enter the fray (after two decades of frankly mercenary work in secular music.)

Straight out of college I lucked into a Church job where the pastor didn’t care what I did, as long as it didn’t interfere with collections or golf.

Ignorant and arrogant, I pleased myself, and looking back I see it was sheer luck that my subjective taste was in line with what was objectively RIGHT.
We learned chant, we did most of Lent sans accompaniment, we sang music from the great choral tradition….

This time, I will have a liturgy committee (whose head likes to talk about the liturgical dance at her neice’s wedding,); parishioners of three different ethnic backgrounds (two of them recent immigrants,) all of whom feel they have a right to thier own “traditions” (most of which go back only 20 or 30 years, and comprise NO fine music, and no adherence to any official Church teachings on music,); and a pastor who is brow-beaten by our modernist Bishop and his pet liturgist to contend with.

Pray for me!

Daniel
06.25.2003 @ 5:05 pm #

As an amateur and inexperienced organist, my selection of hymns has often caused a bit of a stir, because I am naturally inclined to choose terribly Catholic hymns like “Soul of My Saviour” or “Hail, Queen of Heaven”.

It is such a blessing that the liturgy committee has so little input in what I choose. After a few suggestions, they more or less gave up trying to curb my Catholicism, probably because of my youth and the fact that there is no-one else around that is willing to play at Mass.

In brushing the dust from old hymnals, I have discovered just how many treasures of the Church have been put aside and forgotten, just like the Rosary. Actually, in some cases I think that they are stomped out wherever they surface! It makes me so sad that there is a whole world of devotion and beauty that people my age may never experience, especially regarding the Blessed Sacrament and devotion to Our Lady.

I’m afraid that the negative vibes from the priests and liturgists have served only to strengthen my convictions. I can assure you that many a tear has been shed in the fight to play a lot of what I believe is appropriate - especially at Christmas and Easter. Every one of these ‘battles’ forces me to stop to check that I’m not just being stubborn or uncharitable. At times it is very hard to avoid the transition to ‘crusty, bitter cynicism’ as you so rightly put it.

However, I am privileged to be in the position to remedy some of the pain felt by some of our parishoners. People really are nourished by music, even if the accompaniment is weak and the organ is out of tune. That is the merit of a good piece of music - the music is strong enough to breathe without the flair of a professional organist or trained singers, just as Gregorian Chant retains its integrity, despite the range of voices found in a monastery.

There is very little support for those young people who wish to remain orthodox and sincere in their faith. There is even less support for classical musicians and those who believe in the existence of ideals, let alone aspire to them. Therefore, it is good to know that there are other Catholic musicians in the world who are reluctant to become unquestioning tools for the do-it-yourself Mass.

Thank you so much for your blog!

Me
06.26.2003 @ 6:53 am #

I’m beginning to think that being a music director in a big parish must be akin to dying of thirst in the middle of the ocean–surrounded by the sight and movement of water, but unable to slake your thirst.

And even liturgy done “right,” with good participation by the assembly, nevertheless precipitates continuous battles and confrontations with individuals, esp. “cantors.”

What fool wants to live this way?

<grin> But, tomorrow’s a new day, right?

Maggie Hettinger
07.30.2003 @ 1:02 am #

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